seriously, it was a big loud one :D

Have you ever broke wind in public?  The worst for me was in a pawn shop.  I was looking at a shelf with cassette tapes, and as I bent over, i let the loudest fucking fart ever.  As I straightened myself out, I let another one that rippled wth my bending movement.  I was so embarrased  :-[

But I soon realized that I don't care.  If I feel a fart coming on, then gang way cause I'm gonna fucking blow you away with the stinky breeze!  ;D

*in a prim and proper voice*

Ladies don't do stuff like that.

YEAH RIGHT.

Fifth grade. The school decided it would be AWESOME if the whole fifth grade spent the night outdoors. They served beans. I farted in front of my friends, the boy I liked (!), and a teacher. It was mortifying if you think about how old I was and that old saying that ladies don't poop/fart/other gross stuff.

Nowadays I don't give a damn and I try to pull dutch ovens on the husband.

One time, my step-daughter cracked my back-which is very good at doing. She pushed down on my back and I let one out. I was so embarrassed.



Cat

*in a prim and proper voice*

Ladies don't do stuff like that.

YEAH RIGHT.



They do, but then find themselves in the hospital because they are so backed up!

And yep, I was one of them!
For years I was told women don't do that, it is unbecoming and just plain wrong. Until in college, for about 4 days I didn't let a single fart go - my stomach was rock solid and hurt!! OMG I thought my appendix had burst. Mom took me to the hospital, and an ultrasound proved that the only thing wrong with me was I was packed full of gas! Acouple of enemas and a few days later I was empty as could be! Never doing that again!

Now I let them go no matter where I am or who I am with!
Hubby, The Son and I have named them as well! ;D
We call them H-Bombs, (H for our last name initial) and sometimes we compete to see whose is loudest or stinkiest! I rarely win cause my man has a nasty ass when it comes down to it!!

But I did let one while he was on leave, made his stomach curdle.... I thought he was really going to throw up!!

Score 1 for me!!

Nowadays I don't give a damn and I try to pull dutch ovens on the husband.

I do this all the time but hubby normally wins!

Now I let them go no matter where I am or who I am with!
Hubby, The Son and I have named them as well! ;D
We call them H-Bombs, (H for our last name initial) and sometimes we compete to see whose is loudest or stinkiest! I rarely win cause my man has a nasty ass when it comes down to it!!


You need to get ammunition first.  Eat lots of chili and/or anything with spices.  Your ass will be flaming gas in no time

Whenever I eat chili, I let the loudest cracking farts that honest to god sounds like I just shit my pants with diahrrea ;D

You need to get ammunition first.  Eat lots of chili and/or anything with spices.  Your ass will be flaming gas in no time

Whenever I eat chili, I let the loudest cracking farts that honest to god sounds like I just shit my pants with diahrrea ;D

and I bet you have had to go double check just to be sure you didnt!!!! ;D

Ya want ass-bombing?

Come to my house, when I've eaten pineapple.
I have been known to chase children away, with my butt bombs.

My fart powers stem from the year or so that I starved myself, then ate regularly again.
Howard Stern ain't got nuthin' on my rump cannons!

Ya want ass-bombing?

Come to my house, when I've eaten pineapple.
I have been known to chase children away, with my butt bombs.

My fart powers stem from the year or so that I starved myself, then ate regularly again.
Howard Stern ain't got nuthin' on my rump cannons!


You and my husband are in a league of your own!
Especially if he drinks the pineapple orange juice crap by Minute Maid!!
I vacate the premises immediately! ;D

Not sure what the husband ate last night, but I was gagging until he finally got up and crapped. Jesus christ almighty.....I think he even made the dog comatose.

Not sure what the husband ate last night, but I was gagging until he finally got up and crapped. Jesus christ almighty.....I think he even made the dog comatose.


I think my dog took a page from your hubby's book!
She had my eyes watering last night! And all she eats is her normal dry dog food!!!!

I once let a fart that ripped a small hole in my underwear.  I did what you usually only hear about in movies :D

I once let a fart that ripped a small hole in my underwear.  I did what you usually only hear about in movies :D

Of course I had to stroke you for that one!

Hubby once let one and I thought it sounded like he ripped his draws - he didn't but from pushing it out - he got a hemorrhoid out of the deal!! ;D

I once let a fart that ripped a small hole in my underwear.  I did what you usually only hear about in movies :D


Had a nephew that did this, in a pair of Speedos he was wearing.
Thank God it was at my Mom's house, or it could have been potentially mortally embarrassing......

Aaaaawwwwwwwhhhh, yeah!

Nothin' like that first fart of da mornin'!

You know, there are some topics for which I don't need notifications turned on. This is probably one of them, lol.

;D

Ant


Sure, ya do!









Oh, yeah, I almost forgot:
You farted.

I just let the biggest, loudest, monstrous fart.  I mean, it really felt like I shit my fucking pants on that one.  You ever let those farts where it sounds like air bubbles exiting the water?  It's like when you go and take a shit, and you can feel something coming out, but it's like a watery substance?

:D ;D

I just let the biggest, loudest, monstrous fart.  I mean, it really felt like I shit my fucking pants on that one.  You ever let those farts where it sounds like air bubbles exiting the water?  It's like when you go and take a shit, and you can feel something coming out, but it's like a watery substance?
:D ;D


No,everybody knows girls don't fart ::)

I just felt like posting something gross ;D

The worst kind of farts I ever get are the ones where it actually sounds like you've just let loose a truckload of diahrrea in your pants.  Of course, that's only if I drink a bottle of spicy hot sauce or something ;D

I'm so glad I read these. Its making me laugh so hard again. I guess whenever I'm feeling down, I'll just read this thread. :)

Farts are funny to me, although my sister and my mom say I'm uncouth. ::)

Uncouth? Is it possible to be just plain couth? I bet Strong Sad is plain couth.

As for me, most of the gas escapes from the hole near the top of my body these days... I'm sure there used to be a brain there but... c'est la vie.

I've never mastered the art of holding them in but sometimes I wish I could.  I can't recall any particularly embarassing stories at the moment.  Let me give it some thought  :-\

I can feel a decent one brewing at the moment

Has anyone ever had farts as a result of garlic consumption?

Nope. Beer, cheese, eggs, broccoli, tuna fish, yes.

Ant


Garlic was only part of the ingredients of course(usually ate with pasta or something else that it works well with). This happens when I use alot of it though.

I don't think I could eat garlic by itself.

Has anyone ever had farts as a result of garlic consumption?

Oh yeah farts and gas from garlic are the worse ;D
I try not to fart ,but hell if you have to let one rip what else can you do.my husband will fart after me and tell me that I'm disgusting

I usually try to hold it in at work... Since I have to work with customers... But sometimes it catches me off guard.