Remember Loreena Bobbit?  Well, see, she was in the passenger seat with her new beau, when suddenly she got enraged, so she chopped off his penis and chucked it out the window. 

Meanwhile, these two stoners are in a car behind them when suddenly it bounces off their windshield.  The dude driving turns to his buddy and says "Whoa!  Did you see the size of the dick on that bug?"

What do you call someone who has sex on the bottom?
A fuck up

What do you call a gay dinosaur?
Mega-saur-ass

Things to do in the bathroom stall...

1. Stick your palm open under the stall wall and ask your neighbor, "May I borrow a highlighter?"

2. Say "Uh oh, I knew I shouldn't put my lips on that."

3. Cheer and clap loudly every time somebody breaks the silence with a bodily function noise.

4. Say, "Hmmm, I've never seen that color before."

5. Drop a marble and say, "oh shoot!! My glass eye!!"

6. Say "Darn, this water is cold."

7. Grunt and strain real loud for 30 seconds and then drop a cantaloupe into the toilet bowl from a high place six to eight feet. Sigh relaxingly.

8. Say, "Now how did that get there?"

9. Say, "Humus. Reminds me of humus."

10. Fill up a large flask with Mountain Dew. Squirt it erratically under the stall walls of your neighbors while yelling, "Whoa! Easy boy!!"

11. Say, "Interesting....more sinkers than floaters.

12. Using a small squeeze tube, spread peanut butter on a wad of toilet paper and drop it under the stall wall of your neighbor. Then say, "Whoops, could you kick that back over here, please?"

13. Say. "C'mon Mr. Happy! Don't fall asleep on me!!"

14. Say, "Boy, that sure looks like a maggot"

15. Say, "Darn, I Knew that drain hole was a little too small. Now what am I gonna do?"

16. Play a well known drum cadence over and over again on your butt cheeks.

17. Before you unroll toilet paper, conspicuously lay down your "Cross-Dressers Anonymous" newsletter on the floor visible to the adjacent stall.

18. Lower a small mirror underneath the stall wall and adjust it so you can see your neighbor and say, "Peek-a-boo!"

19. Drop a D-cup bra on the floor under the stall wall and sing "Born Free"

20. When you're in a bathroom stall take a Snickers candy bar with you and when someone is next to you, squish it in your hand and reach under the stall wall and say "You got any more toilet paper over there, This side's completely out."

In other news, herpes were found on Miss Liberty, earlier today.

While the perpetrator is unknown, it is clearly marked as a case of statutory rape.

-Good Insult-

Is yer dick big enough to reach yer asshole?
Yeah?
Then go fuck yerself.

-Good Insult-

Is yer dick big enough to reach yer asshole?
Yeah?
Then go fuck yerself.

If we're going back to the sixth grade, might as well whip this out:
What's better than roses on your piano?
Tulips on your organ.

Lukeseviltwin wrote
When you're in a bathroom stall take a Snickers candy bar with you and when someone is next to you, squish it in your hand and reach under the stall wall and say "You got any more toilet paper over there, This side's completely out."
You think you're clever until the other guy reaches his hand under and says "Sorry, fresh out over here too!"
:o